Looks Can Be Deceiving
How peaceful those three looked, sleeping so quietly in the backseat of the car.
During these moments, I would think: Nah, no minivan needed. Why have a car payment? There are already struggles driving my husband’s big ol’ truck. Imagine the destruction if I were in a larger vehicle. The boys are six, five, and four. We have gotten by this long without a minivan; why get one now? Nope, don’t want one; don’t need one. Look at how peacefully they are sleeping! This four-door car is working out just fine.
Then they wake up. So much noise, bickering, and constant yelling. Did I mention the noise? Sometimes the radio would get turned up to try and drown it out. Unfortunately, noise ordinances prevented the volume from going up as high as it needed to be.
“Stop touching me.”
“Leave me alone.”
“I dropped my toy.”
“That was my French fry, not yours!”
My next thought was if the minivan would be silver or blue.
Grownup Decisions and Choices
Thank goodness no tally was kept of the number of times a head was bumped. Getting in and out of the car, someone without fail would bump his head on the frame. Then there was the constant reminder to lose weight.
“Momma, you are too big.”
Ouch, right? But I could not be upset. Surely three year olds don’t like having the weight of a (way older than three years) mother up against them as she tries to buckle in a sibling.
When it rained, the kids would be just as soaked as me. It takes time to buckle three kids into car seats with almost ZERO space between them. The six year old couldn’t even fit that little hand down to buckle himself in. Oh, the guilt of seeing your children getting wet. Why did they get louder the longer we drove?
After months of thinking, I finally jumped on the minivan bandwagon.
OMGeeeeee, Why Did I Wait So Long?
Yup, that could be me smiling on the first day of school drop-off and pickup in the minivan. With the push of a button, kids got in and out on on their own.
No one was crushed by momma, no heads were bumped on the door frame. There was no screaming or yelling. (Well in all honesty, they still screamed and yelled, but it was much shorter in duration, and no blood was shed.) It was peaceful; it was quiet(er).
It rained the next day, and the four year old needed help with something. I just had to pulled over, climb over the console, help him, then climb right back to the driver’s seat. No one was wet!
Why did I wait so long to get a minivan! It took about a week into owning the momma-mobile before I sent a picture with the caption, “I am officially a mom!”
When a Car Isn’t Just a Car
I had these notions about what a minivan meant to me and to my life. Now the whole world saw me as a mom — not that I did not love my boys and want to shout it from the rooftops. However, there is something said to being able to go out and just be Michelle, without every conversation being about raising children. Maybe in my mind, holding on to my sedan was a way to hold on to that. It wasn’t about a car; it was about my identity.
Being a mom and a wife can be challenging. Someone could call out your name, and you don’t even really hear it. You probably hear your actual name so infrequently it doesn’t even register. Understanding what bothered me about having a minivan, I work harder to carve out some time for Michelle. Thank goodness for other friends, both momma and non-momma. In order to be good momma to these boys, I have got to be good to myself. We all do. It is the only way to keep a smile like that on all of our faces.
So, who is going to join me on the minivan bandwagon? Sound off in the comments below!