Recently, I came across the lyrics from Bob Dylan’s “Forever Young.” I’m a visual learner; although I’ve heard the song many times, I’ve never actually taken in the words. Once I read something, that’s when it sinks in, and, man, did these lyrics sink in. (Read them here.)
I think those lyrics really hit me because in the past few days I’ve realized my baby is no longer a baby. She is a full blown little girl, a toddler about to turn two and a person with strong opinions, characteristics that are similar to mine, and some that are opposite . . . an identity all her own. I catch glimpses of her having a conversation with someone else or looking at her own reflection in the mirror, and I can completely see her. Do you know what I mean?
I see the headstrong teenager she will be, the driven twenty-something that will most definitely work hard and play hard, and the passionate, self-assured adult she’ll evolve into. She has taken the first few steps on a path all her own, and while she is still very young and needs quite a lot of care, what she needs most from me is guidance. This guidance is just as important as the love, shelter, food, and safety her dad and I provide for her. So many lessons from that song are what I hope to instill in her before she leaves our cozy, little nest. I pray that when that day comes, she’ll walk out the door with this advice from me floating in her head. Even if it doesn’t make sense when she’s 18, it will hit her when she needs it most.
Daughter of mine, be . . .
Noble. Give your best shot at making the right decisions. Realize that this is a lifelong commitment, and even if you don’t choose correctly the first time, you can correct your mistakes. Be an example for others, be truthful, and stand tall in your integrity.
Grateful. Know that there is always something to be thankful for. The word blessed gets thrown around a lot, and it’s a wonderful thing to realize how blessed you are, but the key is to be grateful for those blessings. Merely walking this earth and breathing its air are things to be grateful for. Not a day will pass when you won’t have blessings to be counted. Count them.
Brave. Facing that which scares you can be the hardest thing you’ll ever experience, but if you do it, your reward will be tenfold. Everyone, and I mean everyone, has a fear (or two), and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Look that mountain top, that job interview, that audition, that heartbreak, that illness in the face and just . . . jump. You’ll never regret it, and you will always be better for it.
Passionate. Be tireless in the pursuit of that which makes you feel alive. If you want to create, create. If you want to nurture, nurture. If you want to dance, dance. If you want to sell, sell. Whatever it is that makes your soul sing, you should pursue it and pursue it with fervor. Even if your passion doesn’t turn out to be your profession, squeeze it in wherever you can.
Adaptable. Things will always change, always. Roll with the punches, and revel in the newness that life often presents. Never get so set in your ways that you can’t imagine anything changing because I promise you, at some point, it will. The key is to remember that just because something changes doesn’t mean it will worsen (usually the opposite is true), and you won’t ever lose what was. No one can take memories or past experiences away from you.
You. I mentioned things that can never be taken away from you. This is the ultimate — yourself. There is literally no one exactly like you. Your thoughts, your motivations, your laughter, your reactions . . . all of them are completely unique. Use that. Don’t push aside by trying to be like everyone else. There is a time and place to fit in, I’m not saying there isn’t, but try to spend most of your time living life how only you can.
Love, Mommy
This is beautiful, needed and so you! I look forward to more good work and words from your precious heart.
Thank you so much Sharon! I really appreciate it:)
So well written, Hayley! Your daughter is precious and blessed to have a mom like you.
So sweet of you to say! Thank you Debbie:)