A Mother. A Runner.

Have you ever seen What Women Want? That scene with the Nike commercial? A woman. Alone. Running. You can hear her breath and each foot as it hits the pavement. You can see her sweat. You can feel her effort. They don’t show her face when she is done. I’ve always wondered what it looks like. Does it look like my face after a run? Panting, sweating, exhilarated, and . . . smiling.

I started running the summer after my first year in college. I needed an outlet, and though I had never run before, it was the simplest (and least expensive) form of exercise available to me. Two slow, run/walk miles around my neighborhood later, and I was hooked.

More than 12 years later, here I am, still running. I’ve turned to running even more in motherhood than I did before. When I was stressed out on pregnancy bedrest, I used to visualize myself running. On days when I just needed a break, I used to have my shoes on before the hubs walked in the door. A quick baby hand-off, and I was happily on the road to sanity. The lessons I learned from running have affected my parenting style and mantras in more ways than one.

It’s a marathon, not a sprint. This may be a cliche, but it applies to both distance running and raising children. When training for a race, I change my eating, sleeping, and training habits for optimum performance. I do my best to make choices with an eye toward what will help me during the race as opposed to what I may want in the moment. Similarly, I try to parent with an eye toward the type of adults I want my children to become. Choosing the path of least resistance is often easier, but you might pay for it later.

Two Moms Running Cowtown
Just two moms running Cowtown.

That which does not kill you makes you stronger. The last half a mile. The hill on the way back to my house. The 4:30 a.m. alarm to get my run in. These are all things that I don’t want to do, but do anyway. I put in the work, and I reap the rewards. I am faster and stronger now than I was when I began running at 19. In the same way, I put in the daily work of parenting/adulting. I make dinner when I’m tired and give one more hug when I’m already touched out for the day. And the reward of a mostly happy and healthy family is worth every bit of effort.

Recover. Rest days are important for any training regimen. I struggle with rest days because my body craves the run so much — but when I don’t take them, I get hurt. The same thing happens when I forget to take time for myself. I am guilty of doing so much that I end up getting sick because I haven’t taken a break in weeks or months. This helps no one and ends with me being farther behind. The best way to keep your momentum is to take time to rest.

There will be bad days. No matter what kind of shape I am in, I have bad runs. Maybe I ate something funny or I’m in the wrong place in my cycle. It could be that I woke up 10 times the night before thanks to crying children. Possibly, I put my left shoe on first instead of my right. Regardless of the reason, bad runs happen. But they also end, and you still get the credit both mentally and physically for running. We all know bad days happen in motherhood. For a myriad of reasons (ones that could affect you and your offspring) there are always going to be bad days. But the day always ends eventually, and you get to try again tomorrow, having successfully kept the little humans alive for the day.

Mind over matter. If you’ve ever run a race of any distance, you have likely discovered that your mental game is as important as your physical game. There have been runs in which I crossed the finish line by sheer force of will and in spite of my total exhaustion. It is similar to the mental strength you call upon to keep your cool when your child dumps an entire jug of milk on the floor or innocently paints the bathroom with your blue shampoo. You breathe, focus on the goal, and get there by whatever means possible.

When in doubt, get outside and move. There is almost nothing that can’t be helped by a good run outside. Even a rainy day run helps my mood infinitely more than a treadmill session (which is still better than no run at all). I have run when confronted with a plethora of issues, some big and some small, but I always feel lighter and better equipped to handle anything afterward. When my kids are driving each other (and me) bonkers, I do my best to get everyone outside for a walk, chalk art, or puddle splashing. It never fails to drive away some of the funk.

Family picture after the Dallas Half Marathon.

While I may prefer to run away my sorrows and think my thoughts on the track, I know it’s not for everyone. But if anything I wrote speaks to you, I encourage you to give it a try (or keep running along). Runners come in all shapes, sizes, and speeds. You can run too!

We live in an area filled with running events and training groups to help you on your running journey. There are Facebook groups and apps that make it even easier. Whatever you choose, I wish you all the runners’ highs, miles, lessons, and smiles.

Emily H
Although born in Austin, Emily grew up on the Eastside of Fort Worth. After marrying her high school sweetheart, and following the military's whims for a few years, the lovebirds wound up back in the Fort, with their three children in tow. Currently, Emily shares her love of books and writing with both her children and her middle school students. On the weekends, you'll find her outside running local streets and trails, as well as being her kids' biggest fan at whatever sport may be in season.

3 COMMENTS

  1. Hi. I really loved this article. I’m about to get started on my training for the Cowtown half marathon. I’m scared and excited. This post is very encouraging to me.

    • Hoorah for the mother runners club, Lisa! I’m glad you enjoyed the post. I’m training for the Dallas half right now and I love the start of training for a new race. Good luck with your training!

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