‘Tis the season for major mamma stress!
It begins in October. As quickly as they announce the pumpkin spice latte is available, we feel it. The holidays are approaching.
We start looking at our planners and calendars, numbering those precious days between October and December 25. We strategically plan out trips to pumpkin patches and fall festivals, to get our family portraits done, to holiday parades, to Christmas light trails, to school volunteering and events — not to mention all those work parties and dinners.
We somehow manage to fit in all these things on top of our regular work schedules and mom-life requirements. Moms become coordinators of chaos and puppet-masters of their households for almost three months in pursuit of the merriest and most magical holiday season. Ask any mom; we are happy to do it. We love to see our children blissful with anticipation for Christmas day, and we hope we are making lasting memories for our children; however, it is stressful!
I have coordinated nine Christmases in my mom life, and I can tell you as the years pass, I get busier and more Grinch-like as the holidays approach. To fight off all those Grinch-y vibes, I have employed some yuletide guidelines to keep the holidays low-stress and joyful for mamma!
Say “No” to the Extras
We can be bombarded with invitations and notifications about all the fabulous holiday parties and events in our community. If you already have a full plate, don’t be tempted to overload yourself by going to every parade, story time, or breakfast with Santa.
As much fun as all of these events are, the holidays are just as much about being present with our families and loved ones or just snuggled up at home. Additionally, for those parties you do decide to attend, it is okay to bring the ice instead of a homemade three-layered cake.
Say “Yes” to You
If a girlfriend invites you to see a Christmas play or to go shopping together, you might say no because you cannot imagine taking time away from being with your family for something that is solely for you. Take that time! If it will bring you joy, allow that into your schedule. As much as we parents do for and with our kiddos around the holidays, allow for things to be just for you! It is your Christmas too.
Remember Your Friends
Speaking of friends, let’s not forget them in the hustle and bustle. Your tribe, your mom squad, your people. They are the ones whom you lean on throughout the year and the ones who give you the most grace during the holiday months. They understand what the stress, the schedules, and the chaos of the holidays can do to us mammas. Make time for them.
As moms, we know that time is a precious commodity, and taking the time to sit with them and chat shows how much you really care. (They also won’t mind a Starbucks gift card.)
Save a Day
Between parties, business lunches, cookies to bake, endless Target runs and gifts to wrap, we end up spread way too thin. Try to take a day or afternoon for yourself just to focus on what you need to do or get ahead of on your to-do list. Put on some Christmas music, pour some eggnog, and wrap the gifts instead of waiting for the night before Christmas.
Get your girlfriends on board, and be each other’s babysitters so you and your friends can each get an afternoon to take a breath and play catch up. Do not forget self care should be on that to-do list too! The more stressed and busy you are, the more self care you need.
Remember the Mistletoe
For some, Christmas means being around a lot of family. This is wonderful; however, do not forget to sneak in a moment or two for you and your partner to have your own Christmas. You and your hubby can exchange gifts at midnight apart from everyone else or have Christmas date night before the relatives get into town. Honor the relationship that started it all.
Go Your Own Way
Don’t be afraid to change up your traditions! If you normally go to see family or host family and it’s getting just too stressful, take the year off! As long as you give everyone enough warning, there is no reason you cannot do something different for a year. You might find it fits your family better, or you might appreciate the adventure but will be happy to return to your old plans the following holiday season.
Remember You Matter
Your children and family want to see you happy and joyful during the holidays. They want you to be part of the magic — not just coordinating it. It’s okay to say “no,” take time, put yourself on the top of your priority list, and change up tradition. Make a snow angel, drink eggnog with your girlfriends, watch your favorite Christmas movie 10 times, or just let Amazon Prime be your Santa’s helper. Find your own enchantment with the holiday season, and don’t get bogged down with the overly busy extras.
The greatest gift you can give your children is the sight of you joyful and bright this Christmas.
